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After four and half contracts two years of working on a cruise ship I get asked lots of questions. One of the favorites seems to be about how crew members hook up or date while working on board. Yes it does happen, a lot. Here are some things I've learned about dating on a cruise ship. This post has not been vetted or endorsed by BuzzFeed's editorial staff. BuzzFeed Community is a place where anyone can create a post or quiz.
For some who have never been lavished with such attention, it can be somewhat overwhelming. It takes willpower and strength to hew to your priorities.
The Ins And Outs Of Dating On A Cruise Ship
Often, crew romance is filled with pitfalls. Flaunting a relationship is not recommended -- it's neither diplomatic nor, in some cases, safe in such a confined environment.
Jealousies are the worst downside. An ex of my one-time beau actually entered my cabin, pulled one of my formal gowns my favorite, naturally from the closet and ripped it apart with scissors, scattering sequins everywhere.
After four and half contracts (two years) of working on a cruise ship I get asked lots of questions. One of the favorites seems to be about how. Have you ever wondered what dating on cruise ships is like? I can give you a hint It's like high school, but worse. And even as ships have gotten bigger, and crew have become more spread out, the basic positives and negatives of cruise ship romance have stayed the.
A Canadian coworker once threw away the work clothes of a Honduran woman because the Honduran was developing a close rapport with my coworker's Polish boyfriend. One night, a Jamaican singer found out that his secret affair with an American singer was not so secret when her Italian band member boyfriend broke down the cabin door and beat him up. And I'll never forget the interplay, so to speak, between a Bulgarian girl and two competitive suitors, as I witnessed her being taken over by a Greek safety officer and then taken back by her Bulgarian boyfriend -- with a hatchet.
The safety officer found safety only at the next port and left the ship. One interesting byproduct of today's international crew is living among people from other cultures.
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That definitely leads to some uncharted territories when it comes to having relationships. With a mix, literally, of plus nationalities, traditions, cultures and differences, there's both a positive and a negative effect.
The positive is a respectful appreciation in learning the ways of others and building friendships. The negative is trying to blend two cultures. The Indonesian Muslim and the Filipina Christian who had spent four-and-a-half years together, secure in the tolerance and the support of the crew, ran into a glitch when they finally told their parents about their relationship. Each then wanted the other to convert but neither could and they broke up.
I remember an Orthodox Greek man who fell in love with an Irish Catholic girl.
Again, they were beloved and supported by coworkers. But on shore, each yielded to their own upbringings. He married an Orthodox Greek woman; she was wed to an Irish Catholic man.
Yet they still managed to enjoy a tryst every year for decades. Neither was able to say goodbye to the other. At most cruise lines, "policy" so to speak is vague.
It's accepted that crew members will form relationships for short trysts, the length of one contract or for a long time leading to marriage. What could corporate management even do to prevent onboard romance if it wanted? From a cruise line standpoint, issues arise when relationships develop into problems that impact work -- at which point one or both parties could be reprimanded, transferred or even dismissed.
Cruise lines have varying rules about allowing longtime and committed couples to cohabitate. Most consider requests from couples to be assigned to the same ship for their next contract; however, requests will be honored only if there are relevant position openings on the same ship, and married pairs will be taken more seriously than shorter-term partners.
Despite what you saw on "The Love Boat," passenger-crew romances are not permitted, with passengers banned from entering crew areas of the ship.
Cruise ship dating
Facebook Icon The letter F. Link icon An image of a chain link. It symobilizes a website link url.
Email icon An envelope. It indicates the ability to send an email. Twitter icon A stylized bird with an open mouth, tweeting.
LinkedIn icon The word "in". Fliboard icon A stylized letter F. Cruise ships foster an intense hookup culture. Sex among cruise ship workers is pervasive, current and former cruise ship employees told Business Insider. Visit Business Insider's homepage for more stories.
Cruise-ship workers say they have so much sex that it's comparable to college
BI Select Cruise Lines. Check mark icon A check mark. It indicates a confirmation of your intended interaction. Some couples go to great lengths to prove that it's not just a "ship thing".
Others just accept it as they accept the fact that they have to work a 13 hour shift the next day. A "ship relationship" is like having a friend with benefits on land. Usually it doesn't work out and somebody is going to be in tears at the end of it all. Everybody gets to a point when enough is enough and you just want somebody to hold and cuddle at night. A friend to go have a laugh and hold hands with in port.
However you only want it when it's convenient for you.
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It's selfish, but it's ship life. It can be lonely. You find somebody who falls for you knowing that it will be the very definition of a "ship relationship". It happened on the ship and it will stay on the ship.
You two will not exist in the real world. It's like the first few stages of dating someone when everything is beautiful and young. It's summer love when you're a kid at camp. It's an explosion of feelings that drift in the air like sparks from a fire. The sparks eventually reach too high and fade away, summer turns into fall and you will only see each other again on Facebook. Such is a "ship relationship". There's two types of break ups on ships.
You are either both stuck on the same vessel during the break up or one of you is leaving the ship. Ship life and ship relationships are only for the strong willed ones. You have to get use to the idea that your heart will leave you at the end of a contract and go to a country you've only visited in books.
Or the notion that you will be stuck in a place full of memories with this person who broke your heart. You see their friends everyday, you are reminded of the time that you enjoyed a short lived break by the pool.
Maybe you walk out into the night and reminisce about the time you watched the moon reflect some hidden piece of the ocean that was special for only the two of you. You slept in a bunk bed together, you ate gruel together. Now it's over. It's even worse if you break up on the ship while you both still have time to serve.
As cruise director, my primarily responsibility was seeing to the . Coupling up on the ship is like dating in dog years: Things move about seven. Sex among cruise ship workers is pervasive, current and former Another current Carnival employee said at one point, she was dating a man. Club Fusion lounge aboard a Princess cruise ship some of the options available for single people, including online dating and a singles' cruise vacation.
You break up and you will see them everywhere. Even if you never saw them on a regular basis before, now you will see them at the most random and inconvenient times.
You can try avoiding them at the cost of missing out on crew events or time at the bar. This however hinders an amazing experience of being a part of a cruise liner. Everything is heightened for a crew member. Time doesn't really exist and drama is more prominent than at a spoiled thirteen year old girl's birthday party.
There is no juncture for grieving, you have to get right back to work and put your best Joker smile on. You know that moment when you find out an ex is hooking up with someone new? Your stomach turns as if somebody is making dough out of it.What are the Crew bar and parties like on the cruise ship? -- Shiplife! Ep-4
Yeah get use to that. The turn around rate on a ship is short. On the other side though you will be stronger for it. Walk on to some hidden paradise, sip on a Mojito and think to yourself, life could be worse.
Also every week or two you get some new recruits.
Hence the quick turn around time. And then sometimes it just works. You two click and you have these amazing stories of how you fell in love on a cruise ship while traveling the world. You'll have pictures of you two on a snowy mountain in Alaska or on a sunny beach in the Caribbean. At dinner parties everybody will actually be interested in how you two met.
Maybe you live near each other back home, maybe you are worlds apart, but it doesn't matter. You make it work.